We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless you count maybe 25 or 30 little scuzzball countries like Scotland that we could vaporize in seconds if we felt like it.
-- Dave Barry AA

I hope that when I die, people say about me, 'Boy, that guy sure owed me a lot of money.'
-- Jack Handey AA

At least half the mystery novels published violate the law that the solution, once revealed, must seem to be inevitable.
-- Raymond Chandler AA

She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
-- Groucho Marx AA